‪Alright time for my hot take on “validity” discourse. “Validity” suggests an authority that can either validate or invalidate who you are and saying “x is valid” reinforces the idea that this is a good thing that we should care about. ‬

It means well but it is based on a concept that we have to seek validation from others or that we can decline to offer it if we so choose; neither are or should be true

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I don’t think it’s bad to tell someone they’re valid, and i think a lot of people like hearing it; it’s more that i think our general focus on telling people that they’re valid makes us think that “what the community says is valid is OK” and conversely “what the community doesn’t say is valid is not” and i don’t think that’s a healthy mindset in general

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Which is why i say “bi lesbians are real” not “bi lesbians are valid”. All I’m doing is saying they exist because they do. They don’t need me to tell them that they’re valid in order for them to continue existing, lol.

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Beach City

Beach City is our private beach-side sanctuary for close friends and awesome folks. We are various flavors of trans, queer, non-binary, polyamorous, disabled, furry, etc.