🥛🚫 Dairy-Free Thot 🚫🥛 @Crowley@beach.city

Eternal 🦡 mood

Crowley: They wanted real guns, so I gave them what they wanted 🤷🏻‍♂️

Aziraphale: CROWLEEEEY THAT KILLS PEOPLE

@wrongomens #GoodOmens

Aziraphale: [gets into Bentley w bunch of balloons]

Crowley: are they helium balloons?

A: yes?

C: I TOLD YOU THE CAR'S NOT ABLE TO HOLD HELIUM BALLOONS!

A: well it's too late!

*Bentley spiralling upward through the air*

Crowley: Ah, we're flying away

@wrongomens #GoodOmens

Aziraphale: YOU JUST HIT A KID

Crowley: well that's his fault; he should NOT be in the road

Aziraphale: YOU'RE DRIVING ON THE SIDE WALK

@wrongomens #GoodOmens

Aziraphale: YOU JUST HIT A KID

Crowley: well that's his fault; he should NOT be in the road

Aziraphale: YOU'RE DRIVING ON THE SIDE WALK

@wrongomens

Aziraphale: [gets into Bentley with a bunch of balloons]

Crowley: are those helium balloons?

A: yes?

C: I TOLD YOU THE CAR'S NOT ABLE TO HOLD HELIUM BALLOONS!

A: well it's too late!

*Bentley spiralling upward through the air*

Crowley: Ah, we're flying away

@wrongomens

waking up all shaky and gross-headed bc I lack serotonin is fun

attempting to get graphic design work done and my laptop, photoshop and tablet are all like

I want to take a Twitter break but I also don't want to miss Good Omens content so maybe I should just mute like

literally everyone but 7 people and GO accounts

I'm just. fuckin. tired. Of people being horrible to other people.

"Cats have been largely responsible for the extinction of 33 bird species worldwide."

Me, passive aggressive about my parents' barn cat catching a bird

okay so I have

✔done laundry
✔swept
✔mopped
✔vacuumed
✔clean dog sick off the carpet
✔washed all the mats

What's this? An email from @CadmiumTea?

*opens it*

.@Synnerxx: Why is there a band called Cattle Decapitation

me: probably the same reason there's one called Anal Cunt

Imagine being the kind of person who ties up emergency services to complain about being woken up bc if an alert about missing children.

"People called 911 to complain about Toronto's early morning Amber Alert" https://twitter.com/i/events/1149314212042141703

Yeah, let's cut through the parking lot between two hotels at 5:30am driving a loud-ass trailer that bangs and clangs over every one of the six speedbumps so you can avoid a 30 second red light

that's not at all inconsiderate

It's not that I don't care about all the bad in the world, it's just that I have enough on my plate rn so I'm trying to focus on that and the joy that Good Omens has given me.

I shouldn't have to defend not performatively caring as self-care but here we are

Crowley, drunk @ karaoke: "closer than my plants you are to meee

he was there through my inserpenation, i wanna show the nation my appreciation"

Everyone else:

Okay but how has this song not been made into a #GoodOmens video? Crack or otherwise, it needs to be done and I can't do it 😂

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWJrPzAUzAs

IM SO MAD THIS WASN'T IN THE ACTUAL SHOW I NEED MESSY MORNING CROWLEY IN MY LIFE

birb update: not doing well this morning

we'll see how it goes